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Manarie li que vaqeriao |At vver eos et accusam dignissum qui blandit est praesent luptatum delenit aigue excepteur sint occae. Et harumd dereud facilis est er expedit distinct. Yoii rockem sockem mow-em yown. Manarie li que vaqeriao.

Occae et harumb bet theap. Est praesent luptatum. Ha! Bis nostrud exercitation ullam mmodo consequet. Duis aute in voluptate velit esse cillum dolore eu fugiat nulla pariatur. At vver eos et accusam dignissum qui blandit est praesent luptatum delenit aigue excepteur sint occae. Et harumd dereud facilis est er expedit distinct. Et harumd dereud facilis est er expedit distinct. Yoii rockem sockem mow-em yown. Manarie li que vaqeriao. Occae et harumb bet theap. Est praesent luptatum. Dignissum qui blandit est praesent luptatum delenit aigue excepteur sint occae.

Et harumd dereud facilis est er expedit distinct. Et harumd dereud facilis est er expedit distinct. Yoii rockem sockem mow-em yown. Manarie li que vaqeriao. Occae et harumb bet theap. Est praesent luptatum. Ha! Bis nostrud exercitation ullam mmodo consequet. Duis aute in voluptate velit esse cillum dolore eu fugiat nulla pariatur. At vver eos et accusam dignissum qui blandit est praesent luptatum delenit aigue excepteur sint occae. Et harumd dereud facilis est er expedit distinct.
there're more, but i dont think anyone will get them, so got didnt copy them.
i love number 4, 10, 14, 16, 18, 23, 24, 26, 29 and 31 LOL

We're not Crazy, We're just Catholic
Reasons why people think we're "crazy"

1 We all have 20 cousins. On each side of the family.

2 Infant Baptism isn't dumb; it's after-life insurance.

3 The signs we make aren't just a mark of respect, they're a lot of fun to do.

4 Every Catholic Guy tries to sit next the really hot girl they like at Mass. THis is because they really want to hug during "Peace Be With You" and hold hands for the "Our Father"

5 We really like statues. A lot.

6 After every confession, everyone hits themselves on the head. This is because they have realized that they forgot that really big sin, and they know that it'll hang over their head til the next time.

7 The 14 Stations has nothing to do with TV.

8 "Peace Be With You" is just a way to meet pretty girls.

9 We've always been taught that celibacy til marriage is the only way to go, forever and ever, amen. That being said...

10 "Sin on Saturday. Pray on Sunday. Confess on Monday".

11 The Mass doesn't start for a few minutes not because of tardy parisihioners. It's because the priest is running late.

12 The Virgin Mary is not a God and we don't treat her as such. But she is without sin, gave birth to Jesus and did it without having sex. That warrants more than a little respect.

13 11:00 a.m. Mass means 11:15.

14 There are two very different, irreconcilable factions in every single church in the world. They are known as the Saturday or Sunday Mass bunch.

15 You miss JPII more than you miss some relatives... but who misses that child molester uncle anyway?

16 Bake Sales are a way of life.

17 Your knees are more calloused than your feet.

18 Priests have been giving us alcohol since we were little kids. No wonder any one of us can drink Protestants under the table.

19 Mass is nearly unchanged after almost 2000 years. We're a little stubborn.

20 Catholic School Girls.

21 You either love or hate the Stations of the Cross. There is no middle ground.

22 We all know Da Vinci code is bogus and inaccurate. Yet we'll still read it if nothing else is goin on.

23 We have Midnight Mass so there are no interruptions on Christmas morning

24 There's no way to explain it, but Catholic girls are just scorching hot.

25 There's no need for impromptu prayer; you can always fall back on the Rosary.

26 Pope Benedict XVI scares you. Badly.

27 It's not uncommon for just one family to take up an entire pew or two.

28 When in doubt, say a Hail Mary.

29 Whenever anyone in Star Wars saga says "May the Force Be With You", we get the urge to say "And Also With You"

30 The Pope does indeed wear a funny hat. But it's way more interesting than Joel Osteen's suit and tie.

31 If you see a guy leaning forward, looking half-dead with his head on the pew in front of him... he's not praying. He's hungover and was guilted into coming to Mass anyway.

32 Even though you never met her or been to a country she's been in, you're still willing to have "seen" a miracle by Mother Teresa.

33 We're the oldest Christian religion. Period.

Dear (last person you talked to/IMed/SMSed),

I don’t know how to break this to you, but I am __1__. I understand if you want to __2__. I found out __3__ when you __4__ __5__. While I am __6__, I also realised that __7__ __8__. Although __9__, I will __10__.

__11__,
(your name here)

1. What is your favourite colour?
Red – a hot, sexaye hooker
Black – a disgusting blackhead
Green – an evil, mindless elf
Purple – going to celibate
Orange – a gorgeous Sun goddess
Pink – a pretty fairy princess
White – going to heaven
Blue – joining the Power Puff Girls
Brown – a piece of crap
Yellow – burning up
Others – becoming a eunuch
None – marrying Santa

2. What year were you born in?
1881~1890 – go swimming
1891~1900 – walk your dog
1901~1910 – chop off my ass
1911~1920 – shag me senseless
1921~1930 – have an affair with George Clooney
1931~1940 – read the catalogue on bras
1941~1950 – mark all the Wednesdays on the Chinese calendar
1961~1970 – snog Michael Jackson
1971~1980 – run into a parked car
1981~1990 – stare blankly at my ass
1991~2000 – go down on Abraham Lincoln
2001~2008 – buy a flat

3. Which month are you born in?
January – George Bush and Randy Jackson are in love
February – green tea is addictive
March – grass is green
April – outside the asylum
May – Brad Pitt bought Disneyland
June – you screwed Bubbles
July – pigs can fly
August – singing is painful
September – Prince William loves me
October – Universal Studios is a swimming pool
November – Akon and Taylor Swift were behind the bushes
December – gorillas are gay

4. What is your favourite TV show?
My Wife and Kids – crapped on
Hannah Montana – snogged
Party Planner – landed on
Don’t Forget the Lyrics – sang to
I Survived a Japanese Game Show – sat on
Sesame Street – spat on
Survivor – read to
Style by Jury – knocked over
Ben 10 – peed on
Spongebob Square Pants – shagged
Heros – glared at
None – rolled you eyes at

5. What is your mood right now?
Annoyed – Tom Cruise
Angry – a coconut tree
Sad – a baseball bat
Happy – your lifeguard
Bored – your best friend
Excited – Dan Brown
Anxious – a pile of garbage
Depressed – your mother
Emotional – the beggar in the streets
Overjoyed – Geronimo Stilton
In love – Mickey Mouse
Others – Cristiano Ronaldo

6. Which song do you prefer?
Decode by Paramore – ashamed
Miles Away by Madonna – heartless
Love Lockdown by Kanye West – worried
I Kissed a Girl by Katy Perry – crazy
Break Even by the Script – miserable
Uncle Mutton by Don and Drew – eager
Perfect by Simple Plan – drowning
Disturbia by Rihanna – irritated
You and Me by Lifehouse – pleased
Hallelujah by Hillsong – screwed
No Air by Jordin Sparks – dying
None – snogging

7. Which animal would rather keep as a pet?
Dog – David Archuleta
Cat – Mariah Carey
Unicorn – Amy Winehouse
Gerbil – Britney Spears
Monkey – David Cook
Squirrel – Daniel Ong
Pig – Bill Clinton
Cow – Angelina Jolie
Donkey – Daniel Radcliffe
Giraffe – Donald Duck
Lion – Robert Pattison
None – Miley Cyrus

8. What is the first letter of your name?
A~B – is in the hospital
C~D – is wearing a blanket
E~F – looks like a flower pot
G~H – is gay
I~J – has a broken spine
K~J – has boob implants
M~N – is blue
O~P – loves flying
Q~R – is screwing around
S~T – a virgin
U~W – 30 going on 6
X~Z – is in love with you

9. What is the last letter in your name?
A~B – Santa Clause lives in your garbage bin
C~D – we had a threesome
E~F – Jason Mraz shagged you
G~H – we are best friends
I~J – Keira Knightley is boobless
K~J – pizzas have anchovies
M~N – Harry Potter is a witch
O~P – the Muttons are gay
Q~R – your boyfriend broke up with you
S~T – you snogged the wrong guy
U~W – you have minty fresh breath
X~Z – dictionaries are interesting

10. Where do you want to go for your honeymoon?
France – forever think of you
Japan – keep you toenails
USA – remember the time we slept together forever
South Africa – always sing you a lullaby
India – dance off beat
The Philippines – never return you your right hand
England – dress you in a Santa Clause outfit
Australia – snog your photograph to sleep
New Zealand – be Schizophrenic
China – sing out of tune
Vatican City – read you bedtime stories every night
None – dream about us together

11. Which piece of clothing do you prefer?
Bra – best regards
Boxers – hope you are in pain
Mini skirt – bidding you farewell
Cargo pants – say bye to your pet gorilla for me
Jeans – singing you songs always
Blouse – hope you hang yourself
Sun hat – go jump off the Causeway
FBT shorts – have fun in jail
Bow tie – thinking of you always
Jacket – screw off
Tail coat – say hi to your parents for me
None – your evil nemesis

Dear Shreya,

I don’t know how to break this to you, but I am a pretty fairy princess. I understand if you want to go down on Abraham Lincoln. I found out George Bush and Randy Jackson are in love when you snogged your best friend. While I am ashamed, I also realised that Amy Winehouse has boob implants. Although Jason Mraz shagged you, I will read you bedtime stories every night.

screw off,
Kellie